Defeat fear!
An article by Jim Connolly
To defeat fear you need to understand how fear works. If fear is getting in the way of your success and happiness and you want to defeat it for ever – this article will show you!
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I a recent article I mentioned a call I received from a well-known BBC radio presenter who wanted some assistance. During his call, he explained that he had just accepted an outstanding career opportunity - to present his very own afternoon program. What was his problem? Fear! This professional Newsreader, who speaks to millions of people every week, was in his own words; "absolutely terrified" at the prospect of moving to the new programme. I suggested we meet and get this problem sorted out.
After a chat with me over some BBC coffee, he was able to transfer that fear into excitement and was really looking forward to this new chapter in his exciting career.
There is a valuable lesson here!
Even though this chap was "absolutely terrified" about this new stage in his career, he knew it was a great opportunity and so he took it - and THEN focused on removing the barrier! He did not allow the fear to get in his way of what he wanted.
One of my former boxing trainers told me that a hero and a coward both felt scared when they were confronted with a fearful situation. What made them a coward or a hero was simply how they reacted. He was absolutely correct.
The people who bravely progress through their lives feel fear just the same as those who elect to take ‘the cheap route’. They simply develop strategies for coping with their fear - rather than allowing what they fear to hold them back.
Of course, motivation plays a big part in the route we decide to take through our life. There is an old saying that tells us; "When you have a big enough WHY the HOW will take care of itself." In other words, when you have a big enough reason or motive to do something, you will find a way to make it happen.
The natural human condition, sometimes called 'the homeostatic impulse,' is to reach a 'place' where we feel 'safe' or comfortable and then stay there. Obviously, people want things to get better for them, but they fear making the changes required so they 'make do'. This 'impulse' explains why so many people stay in unrewarding jobs for their entire working lives. They moan about their salary, their conditions and their boss - but they just won't proactively do something to improve their situation. They complain, but stay the same.
For 95% of the working population, their fear of change means they are locked into a job that they endure - like attending an open prison! If they do move to a new employer, it is usually for another position that will not cause them to have to stretch. If you doubt this for one moment, look at the way people dash for the exit within minutes (or seconds) of their official home time. I have seen middle-aged men and women hustling like schoolchildren around a machine to 'clock-off' and get out as soon as possible. Incredibly, they seem to use more energy in that final few minutes to get away from work than they did at any point during that day!
If you want more from your life you have to embrace change and that means dealing with the fear that we all face. Open that new office, make that cold-call, go for that new job, move into that new area, take on a bigger mortgage, try that new restaurant, start your own new business, find new markets for your services.
Grow a little every day by conquering something you fear. When you know that something is right for you, but you are afraid of doing it - STOP - think of a strategy to defeat the fear and move on. Each time you do this, your confidence will grow and it will become increasing easy for you to make the right decisions and take the right actions.
To your success,
Jim Connolly
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